Thursday, April 06, 2006
Never Far From My Thoughts
It's been a little over 9 months since Marlon's untimely passing, and while I can get through the daily grind alright, there are certain things that just set me off sobbing. I was having a discussion this morning where I stated that generally after people pass away, people forget the bad things and only speak well of the dead- even if the person was a supreme bastard whilst alive. So I thought back and tried to look objectively and saw that Marlon's life is so genuinely celebrated because he was so genuine. This sounds odd for a brother & sister not to fight- but all while growing up we got in maybe 2 fights- both picked by me- because I had never seen Marlon's unwavering patience really break. I had never seen him get truly angry. He was just so incredibly patient and kind- to everyone. I have been thinking about Marlon a lot and have been meaning to post a new entry here. Instead, I tell anyone that will listen- including people who never knew Marlon or people who don't even know me well about how great a man he was. Every day I find something along my path that reminds me of him, so I know he'll always be a part of me. And what better of person to emulate than Marlon?
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6 comments:
Marlon died while I was in Israel, after my dad died in June of 2005. Marlon, while not a daily presence in my life, was someone I could count on, someone who I would see, who I could go to when I needed advice, or bike help, or whatever. He was important for this community and important for me, and... well, everything changes, I know, but sometimes it's really hard to deal with that change.
Be well. And thank you for this.
I was just thinking about Marlon this evening, because I was discussing Wilhelm Reich, and a memory came into my head of Marlon's deep singing voice giving his rendition of the song, "Orgone Accumulator." Later that night, I just started sobbing, thinking about him. Hardly a day goes by that I don't think about things he used to say, the way he always managed to fix things and be helpful in just the right ways. It's been two years and I still miss him so much. I wish I could have found a way to hold on to him, and keep him from going away. I wish I had found a way to be as kind to him as he always was to me. I once gave Marlon a Harry Potter "chocolate frog" card and he was so excited about it that he jumped up and down and tacked it to his wall... lately I've been thinking about a saying from a Harry Potter book -- "Do you think the dead we have loved ever truly leave us?"
I just told some parents, trick or treating at my door, about Marlon's hilarious Halloween routine: dressing up in the pink bunny suit, starting up a chainsaw, and terrifying everyone, in a completely absurd and fun way. What a guy.
i just now got my internet back, but everyday i look up at the sky and throw a big kiss to him, and i often talk to him, i wish i knew his e mail address in heaven. your loving mother
this tues would have been marlon s 35th b d, and every yr since he moved to philly, i would take him out for something to eat, i almost went to the same chinese rest. for some takeout, but i merely had a cupcake in his honor. his friend martha said she would light a candle for him. his sister, brother in law, and little ivy all went over to lemon hill, where marlon s and amy s granmom went so often as a young girl, i m sure grandmom and marlon s prensence were there today looking on, seeing how big ivy has gotten. well, happy birthday marlon. you are truly missed by all whose life you touched, love, your mom
Today i rode the bike you made again everyone tells me i am too big for my bike, but i don t listen to them cause you made it so happy birthday uncle marlon. you are funny why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to get run over by a car. love ivy la didi
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